Thursday, 25 February 2016

Feeling Fearful? Try This...

I was reminded of this a few weeks ago.

Chatting to my NLP teacher and her partner… I realised the giant leap I had made.

4 years ago whilst standing in her training room, my first ever NLP course, the fear of public speaking was making an appearance yet again. Something I struggled with throughout school, college, university and even as an assistant manager in London.

I hated it.

Often hiding behind pieces of paper that I would hold, shaking and whispering words so quiet no one could hear me. The exercise at the time was to create a story in groups to teach the names of the planets in a memorable and entertaining way. I somehow managed escape most of it, assigning myself the role of ‘Chief Artist’ saying the bare minimum by drawing all the diagrams on the board instead.

Much more enjoyable I thought! Funny too, as there were only 4 people in the room… I was that terrified.

Avoidance, however, doesn’t help you improve things.

And the satisfaction I have felt since by acknowledging and facing my fears totally outweighs the 5 minutes sketching a comic strip on the board.

Sometimes when taking a moment chatting to others about our journey we realise how much things have transformed. Take a moment to consider…

  • Is there an area of your life you used to really struggled with and now you find much easier?
  • What did you learn about this on the journey to success?

With regards to public speaking, I started step by step by holding myself accountable and scheduling weekly talks. The first ever meetup I held over 3 years ago was in a small bar in Raval, Barcelona, with just 3 people. With support and encouragement both from myself* and members this became easier and easier. Also by removing limiting beliefs and using light hypnotic language to tell my unconscious everything will be ok helped to transform that area even further.

4 keys to moving from FEAR to SUCCESS effectively...

Social Accountability - Schedule that event before you feel ready, hold yourself accountable.
Practice - Practice, practice, practice... there is no failure, only feedback!
Support - Open up to finding and receiving support from both yourself and others.
Removing unconscious barriers - Find the unconscious root cause and remove it with love.

Fast forward 4 years from my first NLP training, and I now teach weekly classes on NLP and Self Awareness techniques to large groups, largest being 45+ people! Whilst there is room for improvement and each week I learn more and more… the transformation from what I used to be like to now, has been quite humbling. I would not be where I am today if it wasn’t for my NLP training and desire to share these invaluable tools.

Tweet: "If you're Finding Excuses And Reasons why you can't... you're keeping yourself in the FEAR zone." Emma Bradford

If we allow it, fear can take hold on us we may even try to shove everything under the carpet to avoid the pain.

Though by doing so, the crap often spills out anyway.

For example, by ignoring a fear of rejection it can manifest as a bad habit or illness the more we suppress it. It is simply the emotion's way of shouting for our attention. Ignore it, and it will find another way to get your attention. 

By observing how you feel with kindness and dealing with the root cause creates long lasting results. This is what I do with clients, with the combination of them…

1) Accepting personal responsibility for their life, willing to participate during a program of sessions e.g.)  showing up and doing a few super quick reinforcement NLP exercises between sessions if required.

2) A desire to experience change with the support and skills provided.

And I as their NLP coach help them to…

3) Find and heal the root cause by reprogramming their unconscious and create a more compelling future.

Together we can create significant results as we don’t treat the symptoms, we treat the root cause. If you want to hear what my clients really think you can click here.

In the meantime I encourage you to consider…

  • Is there something in your life that you find challenging and often avoid?
  • What have you been looking to feel or gain by not dealing with that fear directly? 
  • And what are you losing as a result of this behaviour?
  • Take a moment to notice how stepping into that, owning the experience and saying yes to change can bring so much more joy in the years to come when you overcome that fear. Better than avoidance, right?

I’d love to hear from you!

Using the comment section, what area of your life will you apply the 4 keys (Social accountability, practice, support and working with your unconscious mind)? When will you start doing that? Schedule it now and hold yourself accountable noticing the transformation that follows when you take action.

Or is there something else that has helped you improve an area in your life? If so feel free to share your experience and insights below. 

Until next time, wishing you a great month ahead!

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* I encourage you, every time you step out of your comfort zone to give yourself kind words, a hug or a pat on the back. Positive reinforcement makes future steps so much easier! 

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