Could This Be The Answer?

Those following my work will have noticed I've been travelling a fair bit recently. Family gatherings, funeral, workshops... I think I'll be buying a fair few trees to be planted this autumn to make up for the many flights!

One thing I've noticed whenever I return to Barcelona, step back into the flat and start unpacking is how living with just a few things can make life so much simpler. I feel lighter, freer.

I also went to Menorca for August with just 1 item of hand luggage, most of which was taken up with my laptop. And looking at my wardrobe afterwards I realised how much stuff I do not use with a strong urge to give the majority away. This urge also seems to arise whenever I take self-awareness courses and Training's, it's as if when I move something within me, I need to move the stuff around me too.

And you know what?

It feels so good!

Whilst we may not want to live out of a suitcase for the rest of our lives, significantly reducing and spring cleaning our living space can have numerous benefits... 

1) Charities and those in need benefit from donated clothes and books etc.

2) Cleaning and clearing physical items around us helps shift the energy around us also... which in turn affects the energy within us too.

3) Getting rid of the old in our lives creates space for the new to come in. I remember a teacher once saying that before she manifested her life partner she literally cleared space in her house for this partner (that she had yet to meet) so could move in one day. As if she was saying to the Universe "I'm ready! I'm creating space in my life (and home) for a loved one to share it with me".

4) Life is simpler. 

Click To Tweet: "Simplify life, create space and welcome the new" Emma Bradford

Number 4 alone is golden. I mean how full can life get sometimes? Bills, work, emails, chargers, passwords, food shops, cooking, cleaning, washing, commitments etc. Cutting back, sticking to essentials only can create so much SPACE.

Space to notice the freedom, presence and valuable small (Big) things in life.

Feeling overwhelmed? Stressed? Cluttered? Or simply looking to create change and bring new energy into your life?

Strip back. 

Wardrobes, cupboards, drawers, asking yourself... 

1) Is this necessary and important? If yes, keep it. If no move on to next step...

2) Is this meaningful, beautiful and something that puts a smile on my face? If yes, keep it if you wish. If no, time to release it.


Life can be so simple and beautifully rewarding. 

Let's make it even more so and notice what shifts occur by doing so. 

What helps you feel lighter, freer and more relaxed in life? Let me know in the comment section below.

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The Experience That Changed Everything... Where Wholehearted NLP Really Comes From

Things don't always make sense.

Many times amidst the confusion, lies an invitation for us to find the clarity deep within the experience... if we dare to step into the truth of it. Outer facades dropping to reveal what really lies within. 

Intuition sometimes works in this way, pulling us towards or away from something without the initial clarity as to WHY we feel that way.

Few years ago I felt a strong pull towards Menorca - especially to a particular part of the island. When I arrived, I met a local and we connected straight away. This time it was different, I felt a strong need to talk to this person, almost as if it was a knowing, a 100% certainty even though I was initially unsure why.

We kept in regular contact after that first meeting, the intuitive pull remained strong. I thought I had met a life partner, whereas the true intuitive message would soon appear as something completely different. 

This person, at an unconscious level, was about to teach me one of my greatest lessons in life. One that would completely transform my work, my outlook on life and so much more. I had no idea at the time of meeting - neither did they. I just knew, for some reason we were being placed together.

Ever since I can remember I’ve been an optimistic person naturally able to re-frame events. Supporting friend's in need, I literally felt their pain and desperately wanted them to feel better. Naturally this developed into my profession too.

I find it easy to focus on the light, all things positive. It allows me to see and remind clients of their true potential when they’ve lost all hope. 

I’d learnt like many to ignore my emotions growing up - a way of survival from a young age. Long term, that behaviour was actually doing me more harm than good. Looking back now I can see how out of balance I was.

By only acknowledging the lighter side of things... we can never fully experience wholehearted self-acceptance.

Back home on the beach I watched the waves eating their way across the shore, observing the wet stones glistening in the sand. One caught my attention; it was a beautiful oval, grey, sparkly stone, which reminded me of this person. I bent down to pick it up when a huge wave came. As the wave retreated the stone was gone. Disappointed, I looked around though it was nowhere to be found. Still thinking of that person, another stone caught my eye in the same spot. Little did I know then what this beautiful heart shaped stone would truly represent.

Listening to my gut instinct, I took another trip to Menorca a few months later. There was a moment on this trip where everything clicked into place, certain conversations and the realisation that this person was not for me in the sense I initially thought. The expectation bubble was brutally burst. Painful at first until I realised they were coming into my life as one of my greatest teachers, in the moment I needed it most. 

A perfect mirror to face my shadow parts (parts we hide, dislike, avoid, suppress) and see them with love.

There, I saw a parent holding their sobbing child... eyes closed, with a loving calm breath, embracing the hurt with 100% presence. Later to ask the child, ‘what did you learn here for next time?’ 

I realised deep within THIS is how we need to embrace painful emotions within ourselves. Not run from them as I had spent a lifetime doing.

Looking at my stone, its meaning became so clear and what this whole experience was about.

It represents the light and dark within everyone. The importance of embracing our whole selves,  especially the shadow parts.

We can ask ourselves...

“I notice ___(observe feelings)___, it's ok, everyone has felt that at some point in their life, wonder what I can learn here?"

It’s human nature to move away from suffering and often we seek comfort from alcohol, food, unhelpful habits etc. Remember these only give us short lived pleasure, when in reality long lasting happiness is desired. And embracing all parts of ourselves, both light and shadow with love is creating even deeper wholehearted, self-acceptance.

My intuition had led me into the greatest love story - and not the one I initially expected. The longer I held onto expectations the more painful it became. It was when I let go and realised the true message of the experience, things transformed into an even greater love story... with my whole self. 

Thanks to that experience, I now teach Wholehearted NLP, using NLP to find the gifts within the shadow.

Thanks to that experience I'm discovering the gifts ALL emotions can offer. 

Thanks to that experience I'm continuing to learn and acknowledge both the light and shadow, within myself, within others and society.

Thanks to that experience my outlook on my work, life and self has completely transformed, for the better.

Is it all rainbows and unicorns now? 

Absolutely not. It's a daily practice of choosing integration and sometimes it's easier than others. I was clueless of what that intuitive pull was really signifying at the beginning, and this time I found out because I decided to follow the trail of clues. Clues being that pull, towards something, a curiosity to learn more, know more, experience more.

Intuition means 'inspired tuition'. Note the word TUITION. It's only tuition if we don't act on it. When we act on it, that's when can transform into an insightful and useful experience.

It's also important to note that an intuitive gut feeling can differ from person to person how we experience it. I can only speak from personal experience and my experience may differ to another persons experience. 

Pay attention, notice... look back over past events when you 'knew' something was off, not quite right or you needed to do something. 

What were the signs? 
How did you know? 
What's the common thread when you look back over several different events? 
Any similarities in how you 'knew'?

Awareness of this can pin-point how our intuition communicates with us. 

We're all different. 

My intuition can be both an overwhelming happy YES feeling to a subtle, constant pull or push. I know it's my intuition when if I haven't acted upon it, it appears again, and again, and again... that prodding as if to say 'go on'. On the other hand, if I get a sudden overwhelming desire or fear popping up that ceases to reappear again - even if I haven't acted on it - then I know often it wasn't really my intuition. 

Putting it into practice...

What are you being drawn to at the moment? (And no, I don't mean a quick desire for comfort food or alcohol. I'm talking about a sensation within, a gut feeling, a pull towards or away from something).

What does this feeling wish to communicate? 

I wonder, what gifts you'll encounter when you act on that loving message?

Have a friend that would find this useful? Share this with them spreading the love further. 

Want more? FREE resources, events, online community etc all on my website www.emmabradford.net

Whatever The Situation, There Is Always This...

No one can ever take this away from us... only ourselves. 

I was reminded of this on a recent adventure in the northern tip of Menorca. Waiting at the bus stop after a scorching hot yet awesome day on the beach with a dear friend. 

37 degrees.

Yes, the hottest day I've ever experienced... aside from August in Morocco many years ago. Lesson number one, don't ever go to Morocco in August unless you like living in an oven!

In Menorca we waited, and waited and waited... only to discover that the late bus was only for local hotel guests and not the public. 

Damn. 

No car... no bus... I started to contemplate sleeping on the beach. Sure it was an option, though ideally at the time I wanted to get back to the flat. My mind started running through possible options...

1) Sleep on the beach 

2) Walk (might loooong walk... despite being a keen walker)

3) Hitch a ride with a passing car (I was feeling safe as I was with a friend)

4) Call a taxi (though might cost more than a flight home)

So it was decided, for the first time in my life (yes really!) I stuck out my thumb at the side of the road and waited to see if any passing cars were heading in our direction. No cars stopped. 

My friend and I were now considering sleeping on the beach.

I said out loud as I often do when I want something... "Universe, we'd like a lift back home tonight please". 

We saw a couple of late night hotel staff members getting into a car, and asked them if they were headed back to the city where we could get a connecting night bus... no, they weren't though they said a man in a white car round the corner was. 

I felt like I was part of a detective team... 'look for the white car, ask for help'. Back to reality, we found the white car, father and two sons and he said he'd drop us back to the main city.

Phew! 

"You're an Angel!" I said to him... he then decided to drop us back not just to the city for a connecting night bus but direct to our town. "I would only be half an Angel if I didn't take you all the way" he laughed. 

We made it home, feeling blessed and grateful for the extreme generosity of the locals on this little island. 

No matter what we think at the time, we always have options. There is always choice. Even if we feel we're in the depths of despair in challenging situations in life, even with situations we cannot change such as a loss of a loved one... everything falling apart around us... there are still options. We can see things from a different perspective and make the most out of a challenging situation. 

Click to Tweet: "We can create obstacles or stepping stones it's our choice" Emma Bradford

By remaining fixated on the problem we miss the solutions and possibilities that are available around us. A closed mindset doesn't see the whole panoramic. An open mindset has the flexibility to open up to new experiences and opportunities. 

And it just so happened, the car journey home was a great insight into local life too, quizzing the locals about the best things to do on the island, hearing direct from the islanders mouths. 

...

So next time you find yourself feeling stuck in a challenging situation ask yourself this...

1) What are ALL the options available here? List them all... even the ones you know you won't take. This act simply reminds us that there are always options and choices... rather than feeling like we're stuck with only one and falling into the victim mentality.

2) What can I learn here? What can these insights help me with? 

Choose one of all the possible options and notice what happens... incredible things can happen when we open up to it. 

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3 Ways To Transform How You Feel Right Now

Looking up at the cool, star filled country night sky, I breathed a sigh of relief. 

It had been a hard 6 months. 

A breakup, work & money stresses and day to day life struggles. I was  burned out, ready for a change. It was this that led me to book a weekend retreat over a year ago. A weekend just for me on one of my favourite islands, Menorca, to unwind, learn, reflect and reconnect. 

When we get caught up in the daily grind we can forget how disconnected we become. Continuing to run in circles on a hamster wheel out of fear rather than take a moment to step off, regain our balance and reflect on what is necessary. 

Are you currently in a state of fear or LOVE? 

Is what you are doing right NOW absolutely necessary for your current or future health and well-being? 

If not, how can you readjust your priorities so that you continue contributing to your health and well-being?

Sometimes a check-in or reminder is all we need. Sometimes a break-state exercise can work wonders (keep reading for more), and sometimes we need a complete break. A break to press the 'reset' button so we can regain alignment, and leap forward into new exciting experiences and opportunities in our lives.

I know that when I have felt stressed, anxious or in a state of fear in the past my focus was simply out of alignment with what I wanted. I was focusing on what I feared most, listening to the Inner Critic's spew of hurtful comments and forgetting to connect with what truly fills me with joy. 

You see, we can create our emotional state. Anytime, anywhere. In fact we do it all the time... just most the time we are not conscious of it. Emotions don't just happen to us. It can feel like they do if we live our lives unconscious of our thought processes. With awareness though we can notice that by tracing out thoughts back after a particular emotion arises... there you have the answer. 

There you have the root cause. 

Click to Tweet: "When we choose to embrace ourselves, life can feel even better" Emma Bradford

There are many tools and techniques out there, it can be an overwhelming supermarket of self-awareness techniques. Which is why I have kept not all, though most of my focus on NLP. It works, it's simple and it gives us the emotional mastery tools that make any challenging situation so much easier to bear. 

That retreat a year ago on Menorca was one of the many experiences that inspired me to create my own so others could experience the same with some additional NLP techniques. If I could create a wonderful relaxing break PLUS the life tools to take home so to enjoy a happier, healthier life with less stress, now that would be something valuable indeed. 

And this is exactly what I have chosen to do. 

First, if you feel you need a SOS reset right now, feeling stressed and frazzled longing for an escape try one of these 3 BREAK-STATE exercises...

• Dance to your favourite song, not only does your moving body help your physical well-being it also releases feel good hormones boosting your emotional state. And not forgetting that music is a powerful, powerful healer.
• Take a brisk walk outdoors in nature, so you can soak up the negative ions (that are positive for the body). I don't know about you, I find it virtually impossible to not to feel grateful and uplifted when I'm surrounded by nature. Try it, you may you struggle to hold onto the stress too ;-)
• Close your eyes and think of something that helps you to feel happy and calm... this could be a memory, a time in your past where you experienced that emotion. See what you saw, hear what your heard and notice that feeling becoming stronger with every breath. Notice what you say to yourself when you feel happy and calm. If you could give this emotion a colour what would that be? Notice how things start to steadily transform as you imagine that colour flowing through and around your body.

I encourage you to find what works for you, find feel good activities that can give you an extra boost in a healthy and productive manner. Choose to consciously create how you want to feel. 

Yes, it's possible!

And if you'd like to discover specific NLP techniques to effectively manage your emotions, transform your relationship with yourself and that critical voice within all whilst enjoying the beautiful tranquil Menorcan surroundings get in contact. 

This retreat has only 7 places. If you want to be one of those lucky 7, visit my website for more information on prices and to reserve your place www.emmabradford.net or send me an email at info@emmabradford.net. Earlybird price closing date ends 15th March 2017!

It's time for some radical self-care lovely - let's make 2017 even better.

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How To Transform An Unfortunate Situation Into A Fortunate Experience

Crraack!

I looked up towards a family member with me at the time and we both started to giggle. My hands holding two pieces of broken glass, a perfect accompaniment to the red cheeks on my face.

A wave of both fear and amusement crept over me.

Fear of the unknown, what may or may not lie ahead... and amusement because, really what were the chances.

It was just too funny.

This experience during the summer made me think about authenticity. How being AUTHENTIC can lead to wondrous rewards, even if initially it can feel shameful, embarrassing and/or fearful of uncertainty.

I knew in that moment, standing there in the shop with a cracked glass picture frame in hand, I had TWO choices...

1) To place the glass to one side and move along, not saying anything out of fear of what might happen if I did.

or

2) Own up, be authentic and aligned with my values, willing to accept any consequences that may occur.

Broken down, it was simply a choice of connecting with either FEAR or LOVE.

Tweet: "When you open up & show up, you put yourself in line to receive beautiful gifts. When you hide & withdraw, you remove yourself from the abundance that wishes to greet you" Emma Bradford

This also ties in with a recent NLP class I taught a few weeks ago, discussing the huge topic of Life Purpose with group members. One of the definitions that came to mind was...

"To connect with what brings us happiness and joy (in a healthy, fulfilling way)... being AUTHENTIC and aligned with our values". 

This can help us create direction and connect with our life purpose. 

If we value LOVE in our life, by acting in alignment with this value can bring great fulfillment and rewards. For example by being loving to ourselves and others whilst maintaining and respecting boundaries.

If we value CONNECTION, again, acting in alignment with this can open up wondrous experiences in our life. For example, prioritising moments of true connection with others, whether that be physically with a partner, through conversation, presence and/or support.

What do you value in your life? 

And are you acting in alignment with those values? 

If not, how can you create more alignment in your daily life? 

One of my personal values is authenticity, which is why I automatically felt called to go straight to the shop owner and confess what had happened. It was something I had to do as the more I intend to connect with authenticity in my life, the more painful being inauthentic is. 

I simply can't do it. 

The best thing was, after confessing about the accident I wasn't charged and was even given a free picture frame mount in return. 

Situation transformed!

Being authentic is allowing ourselves (without judgement) to be bold, and colourful if we wish. Trusting and giving ourselves the space to simply be who we want with flexibility, so we can change priorities and values to what resonates if needed.

As we grow throughout life, so may our values. That's perfectly ok. And as we go through new experiences our priorities can change.

Being authentic is a continuous practice of paying attention to ourselves and what's important to us in each moment... living our day to day life with the intention to resonate with alignment with what we truly value and what feels right.

Now it's your turn! If you were to know, what are some of your top values in life? You can discover this by considering all areas of your life from relationships, to career to spirituality etc... what is important for you in each category? e.g. intimacy, success, connection...

Pick one value, and brainstorm how you can bring in more of that into your life over the next few weeks. For example, someone may say intimacy is key in relationships, therefore they may intend to open up, share, be vulnerable with loved ones even more so to help create more intimacy. 

Notice how this can TRANSFORM any challenges you may be facing the more you connect and align yourself with your values.

Using the comment section below, hold yourself accountable and state what you'll start doing and when to experience these shifts. 

Have a friend feeling lost and in need of a helping hand? Offer them some support and share this post. How can you guide each other in being even more authentic and aligned with what you find in important in life? 

If you'd like to be the first to receive these monthly insights, and receive a FREE Boosting Self-Esteem kit too, head on over to my WEBSITE where you can sign up for positive change.

One Common, Forgotten Key To Manifesting What You Want

'Think big'

'Skies the limit' 

'Don't hold back'

...how often do we actually do that? 

How often do we allow ourselves to ask for what we really want?

Maybe you do allow yourself to ask and take action towards goals yet still find yourself in times of struggle and hardship?

I have seen both with myself and clients, that so many of us place ourselves at times, in these containers of 'I don't deserve it', 'I'm not good enough', 'don't be greedy' etc. Believing that if we are happy, successful and receive wonderful things then that's often considered as a threat to others. Now that's an unhappy belief to hold onto! 

What if we were to change things and start allowing ourselves to receive those gifts? If we allow ourselves to experience happiness then we naturally radiate that others, helping the world to be a brighter place.

I was reminded of this on a recent holiday to Menorca. I emailed the reception staff before travelling to check if I could have two single beds, for myself and my friend who was joining me in the studio flat I reserved. I thought, "you know what I really would love? Is a studio flat with a sea view and a terrace too. Why not?" I considered it for a moment as I heard the dialogue starting in my mind "You can't ask for all of that, it's too much, you're just being greedy, you're already requesting a change of the beds blah blah blah." I observed the thoughts and then let them go proceeding to request what I wanted regardless, ceasing to listen to the limiting beliefs further. 

[Before I continue, I'd like to add that everyone has moments of doubt and negative self talk at some point in their lives (yes even NLP coaches!). I point this out to let you know that it's OK. It's what makes us human. Be kind to yourself, as it's what we do with these thoughts that really count. The less we focus on these doubts and detach from the negative stories we tell ourselves, the less they will have an impact on our lives.]

Later that day I received a response, saying that all the studio flats were on the ground floor with no sea views and no terrace so the extra requests were not possible. "Fair enough" I thought, "Even though it would be really nice (and I believe I deserve it!)... I'll let it go." 

When I arrived to check in, despite my initial booking all the studios were unavailable as they accidentally double booked themselves the last minute. 

This resulted in receiving a completely free upgrade to a 3 bedroom flat with sea views and a terrace. 

Result!!

Would I have still received that if I hadn't emailed that request? Who knows. 

However, I am sure that by...

• Allowing myself to request that and put the message out there regardless
• Being open to receiving what I wanted (i.e. believing that I deserved it) 
• AND most importantly letting go of the 'how' and fearful attachments to the results

...helped to bring that into reality (more on how we create our reality here). 

When manifesting/goal setting if we are constantly stuck in a place of doubt, fear, 'I don't deserve it' mentality... even whilst taking action towards our goals, that's often when the struggles and set backs come into play. It's not to say everything will be completely 100% plain sailing if we don't. Just that by asking, believing and letting go of the reins of attachment it can help to make the ride a whole lot smoother. 

Next time you catch yourself wanting something and hearing that Gremlin in the back of your head with all the excuses, limiting beliefs and fears...take a moment and STOP.

1. Briefly observe the doubts and let them go by changing your focus back what you want - not what you don't want or the fears surrounding it. (More info on how to remove persistent limiting beliefs here)
2. Feel how good it could be to have that as you visualise it (Make it sensory based noting what you'll see, hear and feel)
3. Put the message out there by taking action. Bite-size, actionable steps to move towards that desired outcome.
4. Then, change your focus back 100% to whatever you were doing previously in the present moment. This helps to let go of attachment to fears and doubts and surrender to the flow of true manifestation. 

I often find the last step is the most powerful as it helps to release attachment and stop entertaining the fears and doubts. If these are left to linger within our focus they can reverse the whole manifestation process. This is the hidden key that most people forget about. Bringing our attention back to the present moment.

Try it. 

Notice what changes as you use that hidden key whenever you wish for something. Using the comments below share what you would love to receive in the next month and observe what thoughts come up. If you notice any 'I don't deserve it' beliefs, challenge them and state positive phrases to break that down such as 'I am choosing to deserve it' or 'With every breath I take my self worth grows stronger and stronger'. Then following the steps above notice what happens. 

Have a friend that would find this useful? Share this post and offer a helping hand.

Until next time, happy manifesting ;-)

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